A Day In The Life

Today was another day. I woke up, went to work. Came home, took a much needed nap after the long weekend. I woke and watched a movie with the little one, and then we had dinner. Folded laundry, did some homework. Now I'm laying here. Enjoying the time. The little one is sound asleep, I have some soft pop music playing. It's nights like these that I spend reflecting on everything that has been going on in my life. Lately there have been many changes. A big move a couple months ago, new friendships, and new jobs. My life is so hectic sometimes, so when I have this time I take advantage of it. I feel guilty sometimes for doing so, but I'm trying my best to succeed at so many things. It's not always easy, and when I first became a single mom I had no idea the struggles I would face. Everyday isn't good, but there is good in every day. I work hard now to give us a better life one day.

-Reflecting

Three Blind Mice

How is it possible to have feelings for three people at once. 

The way he texts me good morning. And goodnight. The way he mumbles when he says something silly because he's nervous. The way he uses big words out of the blue. The way he encourages me. The way he smiles and his eyes light up. Our first date, every moment of it. How we actually had a real date. The way he has been counting down the days he has left at work until he can see me. 

But then there's the way he walks into my life and sweeps me off my feet. The way he talks about the  things he's passionate about. The way he compliments me when I don't expect it. The way he looks at me with those green eyes of his. The way he tickles me when we're lying next to each other. The inner strength I can see in him, even though he's never told me anything about it. The way he pulls me close to him.

And there's the way he makes me laugh. How we have some of the most fun times I've ever had together. The way we cuddle all night. The way he kisses my hand. How I feel when I'm with him and his friends, like I belong. The way he carries positive energy everywhere he goes. The way we just connect. How he is slowly opening up to me. 

When I met each of you I never knew something more would come out of it. I never wanted to feel this way. I never wanted to feel like I had to make a choice. I never wanted to make you feel like I was only seeing you, but I never meant for it to become such a secret either. I've wanted to tell you. Or ask you what you wanted between us, but it hasn't ever come up. You've never asked me either though, each of you kind of just assumed. 

But then again maybe none of you are quite right. Maybe I choose the wrong one, and the other two meet someone new. Maybe you find out that I'm seeing him too, and walk away before I get the chance. 

But maybe I need each of you in my life. Maybe I feel too deeply about each one of you. Maybe one just isn't enough. 

Everyday you're on my mind, just send me a sign. 

-Who Knew This Could Hurt